Lessons from the Shadowland

Good Friday

2011-04-22T12:10:00.000-05:00

Today is Good Friday, the day that commemorates the crucifixion of Jesus. It's not as popular as Easter. Light and triumph are more appealing topics than darkness and death. Yet without that death, there would have been no resurrection...no forgiveness, no glorification, no light. So, it's an important day to remember.

As I pondered what to post to recognize the day, I found myself coming up short. What can one simple human say to reflect on the greatest event in history? Then I thought of Isaiah 53, written hundreds of years before the birth of Christ. After all, the Bible usually says it best.

Isaiah 53

¹ Who has believed our message
   and to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?
² He grew up before him like a tender shoot,
   and like a root out of dry ground.
He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him,
   nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.
³ He was despised and rejected by mankind,
   a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.
Like one from whom people hide their faces
   he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.
⁴ Surely he took up our pain
   and bore our suffering,
yet we considered him punished by God,
   stricken by him, and afflicted.
⁵ But he was pierced for our transgressions,
   he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on him,
   and by his wounds we are healed.
⁶ We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
   each of us has turned to our own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
   the iniquity of us all.
⁷ He was oppressed and afflicted,
   yet he did not open his mouth;
he was led like a lamb to the slaughter,
   and as a sheep before its shearers is silent,
   so he did not open his mouth.
⁸ By oppression and judgment he was taken away.
   Yet who of his generation protested?
For he was cut off from the land of the living;
   for the transgression of my people he was punished.
⁹ He was assigned a grave with the wicked,
   and with the rich in his death,
though he had done no violence,
   nor was any deceit in his mouth.
¹⁰ Yet it was the LORD’s will to crush him and cause him to suffer,
   and though the LORD makes his life an offering for sin,
he will see his offspring and prolong his days,
   and the will of the LORD will prosper in his hand.
¹¹ After he has suffered,
   he will see the light of life and be satisfied;
by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many,
   and he will bear their iniquities.
¹² Therefore I will give him a portion among the great,
   and he will divide the spoils with the strong,
because he poured out his life unto death,
   and was numbered with the transgressors.
For he bore the sin of many,
   and made intercession for the transgressors.

Have a blessed Good Friday and a joyous Easter!

The Center of My Universe

2011-04-01T19:42:00.003-05:00

Leaving God out of the Equation

“The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God’” (Psalm 53:1a ESV).

Sometimes I flatter myself that I’m the center of Shadow’s universe. After all, I’ve already shown that she follows my every move and seeks me out when I’m not around. She looks to me for food, for shelter, for comfort. She even panics--sometimes--when I’m not in sight.

Then something happens to snap me back to reality. Shadow displays a lack of trust. She gives me the cold shoulder or, worst of all, lets me know she’s only in it for the tuna and body heat. It’s not about me after all. It’s all about her.

Shadow is the center of her own universe.

That sounds like a harsh indictment on Shadow. It would be if so many of us, feline and human alike, didn’t share the same attitude.

Looking at the words of Psalm 53, it’s easy to dismiss them as directed toward atheists or “bad people.” Yet it has as much to do with a shift in focus as with outright denial. That shift in focus can be subversive. Even Christians can be caught by its subtlety if our attention lapses.

Shadow doesn’t doubt my existence. Neither does B.J. Neither has any other cat who has ever owned me. Felines don’t get caught up in philosophical questions or existential ponderings. Their thoughts are placidly centered...on themselves.

We humans fall prey to the same self-deceptions. We forget the words of Psalm 111, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom; all those who practice it have a good understanding” (Psalm 111:10).

When we forge ahead without praying for guidance, we’ve calculated without including God’s plans in our equations. When we panic instead of relying on God’s provision, we’ve forgotten that God holds the universe, not vice versa. When we put our own desires ahead of God’s will or the needs of others, a subtle shift has occurred. We displace God from the center of our lives and put ourselves there instead. We may not proclaim our unbelief, but our hearts whisper it.

“There is no God. I am the center of my universe.”

And that’s just foolish.

Happy April Fools' Day.

Don’t Worry; Take a Nap

2011-02-28T19:18:00.005-05:00

Trusting God’s Provision

Shadow sleeps. A lot.

I’ve heard lions sleep 20 out of 24 hours a day. I suspect my feline owner is out to meet or beat that average. Of course, she has her active moments. Sometimes a burst of kittenish energy sends her racing around the house or attacking a catnip-filled toy. Most often, though, she limits her activity to trips to her food and water bowls or the litter box. And she sleeps.

She sleeps on my bed when I’m napping. She sleeps in patches of sun that pool inside windows. She sleeps beside the heater vent on winter days. She sleeps on the back of the couch or curled up in a pile of laundry. She sleeps.

It’s amazing when you consider her naturally neurotic temperament. She’s actually quite restful. She never worries about whether her food or water will be waiting for her. If it happens that they’re not--I have to clean the bowls some time--she doesn’t panic. She simply turns, fixes me with a disappointed glare and asks, “Well?” Even if the answers to her needs aren’t obvious, she knows those needs will be met. All she has to do is ask.

I often envy Shadow’s sublime acceptance of my provision for her. Sure, she has some trust issues regarding other humans, other animals and the great outdoors. Yet she knows I’ll never fail her in the most basic of ways.

I wish I could trust my Master the way she trusts me. It’s often difficult, though, to trust in the midst of life’s pressures and daily needs. How will I pay my mortgage this month? Where will I find the money for this medical bill? My daughter has outgrown her clothes; how can I afford more? Nor do I think I’m alone in my moments of panic over those needs and desires that sometimes swamp me. It seems my catly companion has a better grasp than I do of the words in Luke 12 (also found in Matthew 6).

“Then Jesus said to his disciples: ‘Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you--you of little faith!’” (Luke 12:22-28 NIV)

That doesn’t mean we don’t have to work to make ends meet. Shadow has it good. Feral cats have to hunt and scrounge for food. Ravens search for prey. Flowers and grasses work in their own fashion to convert sunlight, moisture and carbon dioxide into the nutrients they need. When we’ve done all we can, though, and those ends still haven’t met…what then? Jesus tells us, right in Matthew 6.

“Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. Pray then in this way: Our Father in heaven….Give us this day our daily bread” (Matthew 6:8-9a, 11 NRSV).

After that, it’s a matter of trust. Ask, and trust that God will come through. He will. It may not always be in the way we expect, or even in the way we think we want. Still, God comes through. He really is willing and ready to meet all our needs, our daily bread and then some. Often, though, we get too wrapped up in our own worries and stresses to let go and let God.

That’s when we need to take Shadow’s approach. Ask. Do what we can and know God will do all.

Then take a nap in the sun.

A One-Woman Cat

2011-02-15T18:57:00.002-05:00

Serving Two Masters

Shadow is a one-woman cat.

I can’t say the reverse is true. I’ll cuddle up to any cat at almost any time. Shadow is more discriminating.

When we first brought Shadow into her new home as a kitten, she was terrified. She wouldn’t come out of her carrier for any urging or enticement. I spent hours coaxing, petting and doling out treats. After several days, she emerged and staked her claim. Our two-bedroom apartment was her territory. I was her one and only human.

Her relationship with my husband was more convoluted. He’s not a “cat person” by nature. No instant bond formed between them. In fact, sparks of jealousy erupted into hisses. (I won’t even tell you how Shadow responded to that.) Glares were exchanged. After a while, my husband decided peace was in his best interest. Only after extensive campaigning, though, did Shadow relent and allow him the occasional stroke or chin rub. The process took four years.

Even now, after another four years of exposure to my husband, my parents and many other humans, Shadow is selective in her attention. My husband remains surprised when Shadow cuddles up to him. When she jumps into my mother’s lap, Mom sends a press release to the local newspaper. Okay, that might be an exaggeration. Such events are noteworthy, though, and never last long. Shadow always returns to her one and only human.

Her single-minded devotion can serve as an example to humanity. Shadow seems to know by instinct what we humans have to learn over and over and over again. You can’t serve two masters.

In the parable of the dishonest manager in Luke 16, Jesus says, “No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money” (16:13 ESV).

Shadow doesn’t divide her loyalty. She acknowledges the existence of a few humans aside from myself, but she serves only me. (Actually, she serves no one, but we’ll cover that in another post.) I am her focus, the center of her world. Her love and devotion aren’t shared; they come to me in concentrated form. No one else is worth looking at or listening to.

Shadow could have chosen differently. Her neurotic paranoia aside, she could have striven for my husband’s attention. She could have presented herself as a friend to every human she met. Or, she could stick with her first choice.

Like Shadow, we all have a choice. It’s the same choice Joshua presented to the Israelites millennia ago.

“And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the LORD, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD” (Joshua 24:15).

We can choose many things aside from God. We can choose money, fame, popularity, career, relationships or other religions. Whatever it is, though, we have a choice. We choose to center our lives on those things or to center our lives on God. We may even say we serve God but still run after the things the world tells us are important. In that case, whom do we love and whom do we hate? To what are we devoted and what do we despise?

I’m sure you know the answer. Whatever you pursue is what you love. You don’t fall wildly in love with someone and then visit them only on Easter and Christmas. You don’t truly love something and then ignore it.

Shadow doesn’t ignore me. She keeps tabs on me. When she doesn’t see me, she seeks me out. She normally doesn’t have to, though, because she’s already at my side. She’s my shadow, a constant presence. She doesn’t divide her devotions; she has only one human.

“But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”

Yes, we could all take a lesson from Shadow.

In Memoriam -- Eternal Life

2011-02-05T13:27:00.002-05:00

(My apologies for being nearly a week late with this post. Hopefully it was worth waiting for!)

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge….

Excerpted from "Rainbow Bridge," author unknown...

Last week, Shadow and I bid farewell to a long-time feline friend, Whiskers.

Whiskers wasn’t a member of our household. She was the 19-year companion of our human friend, Cynthia. During the years that I’ve known Cynthia, first as an employer and then as a friend, I spent a lot of time with Whiskers.

Whiskers was the consummate grande dame. She was black with white accents, including the lush white whiskers from which she took her name. I never knew her as a kitten. By the time Whiskers and I met, she was a sedate old queen, already older than most cats achieve.

She was a lady in every sense of the word. During work sessions at Cynthia’s house, Whiskers played the polite hostess, keeping my lap warm in Shadow’s absence. At times she slipped a sly paw onto my computer keyboard to correct or supplement what I’d just typed. It’s difficult to imagine that Whiskers won’t be proofing any more of my copy.

According to Hollywood, all dogs go to heaven. What about cats? In my heart, I’d like to think Cynthia, I and everyone else who loved Whiskers will see her again. When I look into the eyes of Shadow, Whiskers or BJ, I may not see a soul in the human sense of the word. I do see a spirit and personality so strong, it seems impossible it could be snuffed out forever in an instant.

Yet that’s only my rambling thought. The Bible--my guide to life--is silent on the point.

What the Bible is not silent concerning is God’s plan of eternal life for humanity.

Many people hope for life after death or hope they’ll go to heaven. They don’t have a solid basis for their hope, other than trying to be a good person. (See my thoughts on earning your way to heaven.) Such people rely on how they feel. In the end, that leaves them with no more certainty than I feel over the fate of my beloved felines.

God doesn’t leave us hanging, though. He’s quite clear.

“And this is the testimony; God gave us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. Whoever has the Son has life. Whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life” (1 John 5:11-12, NRSV).

Does that sound like a vague, esoteric statement to you? Let’s break it down.

Eternal life exists, and God gave it to us.
He gave it through His Son (Jesus).
So, if you have (a relationship with) Jesus, you have eternal life.
If you don’t, well…you don’t.

I think that’s pretty clear. If one verse isn’t enough for you, here are a few more. (In the interest of space, I’ve limited verses to those that talk about “eternal life.” More “eternal life” verses are listed at the end of this post.)

“He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end” (Ecclesiastes 3:11b NIV).

“Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life” (John 5:24 NIV).

“For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day … Very truly I tell you, the one who believes has eternal life” (John 6:40,47 NIV).

“I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand” (John 10:28 NIV).

“Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent” (John 17:3 NIV).

“And this is what he promised us -- eternal life” (1 John 2:25 NIV).

“But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:22-23 NIV).

And perhaps the best-known Bible passage in the world:

“Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life … Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on them.” (John 3:14-16,36 NIV).

This post has already grown longer than I planned. There’s much more I could cover, including some stunning descriptions of heaven from the book of Revelation. I’ll let the Bible passages speak for themselves this time; they cover it pretty well! All of these verses, and the further reading below, say pretty much the same thing. To recap:

Eternal life exists, and God offers it to us.
We gain eternal life through Jesus.
So, if you know Jesus, you have life that lasts for eternity.

So, here’s a question to ponder:

What will your eternity look like? What if there is a Rainbow Bridge where Whiskers and the rest wait for us? What if, by virtue of their comparative innocence, animals do have a place in eternal life?

Will you be there to join them?

Further Reading:

Matthew 19:16-29/Mark 10:17-30
Matt. 25:41-46
John 5:39-40
John 6:68
John 12:25,50
Galatians 6:6-9
1 Timothy 1:16
1 Timothy 6:12
Titus 1:1-4
Titus 3:4-7
Hebrews 9:15
1 Peter 5:10
2 Peter 1:10-11
1 John 3:14-15
1 John 5:20
Jude 1:20-21

And, in case you want to know what eternal life will look like:
Revelation 21-22

But She Scratched Me First -- Part 2

2011-01-14T12:15:00.003-05:00

Shadow raised a couple of interesting points in her impromptu post. Let’s talk about them.

Take her second statement first: even if she forgives Missy, nothing will change.

It may be true. That’s hard to swallow sometimes, that we may go through the tough work of forgiveness and find that nothing has changed. Nothing outward, anyway. As I pointed out in the last post, forgiveness isn’t really about the other person anyway. It’s about you. (Yes, Shadow, for once you can say it’s all about YOU.) It’s about your peace and healing, about your relationship with God, about your relationship with the other people in your life. You can forgive someone without ever seeing them again, let alone hearing them apologize, and the effects for you are the same. They have their own burdens to bear. Your forgiveness frees you from your burden.

Let’s be clear, though. Forgiveness doesn’t mean making yourself a doormat. It doesn’t mean going back so the person can dish out the same over and over and over again. An abused wife can forgive her abuser; that doesn’t mean she has to go back to him and continue to be abused. Sometimes relational ties have to be broken for your own safety and well-being. But you still have to forgive. Yes, maybe Missy will still be in Shadow’s face even if Shadow forgives her. Shadow may continue to have to take evasive measures when Missy is around. At the same time, forgiveness may mean she feels freer to come out of the bedroom and spend time with her human. Shadow’s circumstances may not change, but her life will be free from the bondage of bitterness.

As for Shadow’s first point, that she won’t forgive unless Missy comes begging, I’ll let Paul words to the Colossians answer that.

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13, NIV).

This verse doesn’t say a thing about the person crawling on their belly and begging for forgiveness. There’s no debate over who wins the argument. When you extend forgiveness to another person or cat, repentant or not, it’s not supposed to be conditional on their present or future behavior. You’re simply to forgive.

During a particularly tough time in our church’s life, our pastor, Rodney Mruk, said something that forever changed the way I viewed forgiveness. “To forgive is to release the other person from the obligation to make it right.”

That was a revelation to me. So simple! Yet it expresses the same thing as Paul says in Colossians 3:13. When you forgive a person who has wronged you, you may try to heal the relationship, but you expect nothing from them. You release them--spiritually, emotionally and physically--from the need to fix anything they’ve done. They are under no further obligation. Whatever changes they make are between them and God.

And who wins? When you forgive, you do. When you withhold forgiveness, nobody does.

Withholding our forgiveness in a personal relationship might not seem as serious as, say, the search for peace in the Middle East. The consequences, though, can be just as devastating in our own lives. We can become twisted by bitterness, acid territory where no one wants to step for fear of getting burned. Families can be torn apart as those not even involved in the conflict are expected to take sides. Or, as in Shadow’s case, other cats may have to tread lightly for fear of getting scratched by Missy or Shadow in the middle of one of their battles.

God doesn’t give us arbitrary commandments. He tells us to do things for our own good, things that will help us and not harm us. And God doesn’t tell us to forgive some people some of the time, or to forgive when they apologize, or to forgive a certain number of times. No, He simply tells us to forgive. Period.

“Then Peter came up and said to him, ‘Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.’”

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Shadow's Perspective

2011-01-05T12:23:00.000-05:00

Shadow here. I haven’t written on this blog for a while, but I think my human has gotten a little out of hand with her moralizing. I’d like to point out a couple of details.

First, that little trollop, Missy, did scratch me first. I didn’t start this; she did. Why should I give in? The only way that will happen is if she comes crawling to me on her belly and begging forgiveness. Otherwise, it’ll be as if she won. And I can’t let that happen.

Second, even if I did go ahead and “forgive” her, nothing would change. She’d still be in my face every day. So why bother?

Any answers to that, O wise human of mine?

But She Scratched Me First

2011-01-01T13:20:00.005-05:00

A Call to Forgiveness

After a month-long hiatus, Shadow and I tried to think of something appropriate to start off the new year. Themes of new beginnings ran through our minds and were rejected...for now. Then we realized we had the perfect theme to begin 2011...forgiveness.

Shadow's response to Missy's aggression doesn't harm Missy, who relaxes peacefully on a pillow.
Instead, it throws Shadow's life into turmoil.

Cats are record-breaking grudge bearers.

Dogs forgive. Cats remember, better than any elephant, and they make you pay…and pay, and pay, and pay.

I’ve already mentioned what a transition it was for Shadow when we had to leave Virginia and move to my parents’ farm in Oregon. One of the great trials for Shadow was having to adjust to sharing a house with two other cats. Missy and B.J. were the established owners. Shadow was the new girl in town. Things may have gone all right, though, if Missy hadn’t gone into attack mode.

The fights! Hisses and yowls flew through the house. Fur drifted down like snow. Blood spotted walls and carpets. Missy had no regard for time of day; two in the afternoon or three in the morning, the claws went out as soon as she spotted Shadow. The fights were uneven. Missy had been raised as a barn cat and already bore scars from many skirmishes. Shadow was a house cat, raised to run rather than fight. As she lost battle after battle, her life became somber and full of fear. She hid under the bed and couldn’t be coaxed out for any reason. Even now, months later, she checks both ways before she leaves the safety of our bedroom. Where she was nervous around other cats before, she now lashes out at friendly approaches, keeping potential friends at bay along with her enemies.

Missy was the aggressor. It was her fault the bitterness started. Shadow, though, let the bitterness grow and turn her life into a place of shadow and fear. If she were human, you might say it happened because she was unwilling to forgive.

Hebrews 12:15 tells us, “See that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no ‘root of bitterness’ springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled…” (ESV).

Because that’s what bitterness is. It starts as a seed, something small or large, intentional or unintentional. Gone unforgiven, it turns into a seedling, and then a sapling. Over time, it grows until it’s as large as a redwood, deep of root and apparently unmovable. Don’t misunderstand; it never actually becomes immovable. With each day and month and year that passes, though, the task becomes more difficult and more daunting. It seems easier to let it remain than to undertake the work and pain it would require to move it.

That’s what Shadow did with Missy. No matter how many times Missy attacked her, Shadow cat always had a choice in how to respond. She had a choice in how deep the bitterness went. She chose to let it grow. That’s not what God calls us to do, though. In Matthew 6, right after teaching His disciples the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus tells them, “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (6:14-15 ESV).

Again, in Matthew 18, Christ stresses forgiveness.

“Then Peter came up and said to him, ‘Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven’” (18:21-22 ESV).

Not that this is easy. It is never easy. The worse the crime against you, the more difficult it is to forgive…and the more necessary. Because--unless you plot active revenge--holding a grudge doesn’t normally harm the person who goes unforgiven. It harms the grudge-bearer. Does Shadow’s attitude harm Missy? Or does it make Shadow’s life miserable and, from there, spill over into Shadow’s other interactions? That’s right. Missy is oblivious; it’s Shadow who suffers.

There’s more to say on forgiveness. It’s a complex yet deceptively simple process. Maybe we’ll cover more next time. For now, start the new year with the words of Hebrews 12:15.

“See that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no ‘root of bitterness’ springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled….”

If a root of bitterness already dwells in your life, get rid of it. Tear it out, dig it up, chop it down. Start 2011 with the fruit of forgiveness.

Happy New Year!

"I'm Late, I'm Late!"

2010-12-04T11:01:00.003-05:00

"I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date!"

Yes, this post is late (again). I'm sorry, because I do consider this blog one of the most important pieces of work I'm doing. Since it doesn't pay or scream at me, though, it sometimes falls to the bottom of the dog pile (pun intended). The next post is coming, though, so I appreciate your patience. See you in a couple of days!

Book Recommendation: The Great Divorce

2010-11-21T23:25:00.003-05:00

This blog isn't meant to be a site for book reviews, or a book club, or a place to plug books in general. When I come across one that might be helpful as further reading though, I will mention it here so you can grab it and delve a little deeper if you like.

The first book I'll mention is The Great Divorce by C. S. Lewis.

In the last post, What If the Catnip Really Is Greener...?, I mentioned the idea of hell as separation from God. If you're unfamiliar with the idea of hell--or heaven--as a state of being rather than simply a place, the Great Divorce is the best book I've ever read that illustrates that concept not just in layman's terms but in a dramatic, concrete way. Most libraries will have copies of this Christian classic, or you can follow the link to buy your own. Either way, a must-read!

Amazon.com Widgets

What if the Catnip Really Is Greener on the Other Side?

2010-11-15T19:35:00.003-05:00

Pushing God’s Boundaries

“Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously.” - Louis F. Camuti, DVM

Our bedroom door doesn’t latch easily. Why does that matter?

This morning around four, I was jerked out of sleep by a faint scratching sound. As a crack of light widened around our bedroom door (my father is an early riser, hence the light), I realized I hadn’t gotten our door latched the night before. Shadow, trapped in our room most of the night, was taking advantage of that fact. I heard her wrestle the door with her claws until the opening was wide enough for her to slip through. Once she was into the living room and on her way to the food dish, I crawled out of bed and shut the door behind her.

I didn’t get it latched.

No sooner had a laid my head on my pillow than the same crack of light appeared, piercing its way through my closed lids and straight into my retinas. Shadow was back, pushing her way through my boundary into the spot she’d been in only a moment before.

Can’t she make up her mind? My tired brain wondered. Why won’t she settle in and let me sleep? As soon as I thought it, I was reminded of the above quote by Louis Camuti. Yes, cats always love to be on the other side of any door. After all, any closed door must be locking them out of untold delights.

Not that Shadow is extreme in her desire to be somewhere else…anywhere else. As seen in my last post, her borderline paranoia actually keeps her on the inside of most borders, real or imaginary. Her predecessor in our hearts and lives, Poppy, was the opposite.

Poppy obtained me when I was a single graduate student in Virginia Beach. Where Shadow is largely passive, Poppy was aggressive. Where Shadow is timid, Poppy was bold. Where Shadow fears crossing boundaries, Poppy crashed through them whenever possible.

He loved the outdoors. He scorched through the door whenever my roommates or I opened it more than an inch. If I managed to block his way, he tore into my ankles with his teeth, venting his frustration at being kept in. When he made it past my foot and into the open air, he was sometimes gone for days at a time. I worried, of course. Little harm could come to him in the domesticated woods behind our house, though, and he always came back.

When I got married and my husband and I moved into a different part of town, it was a different story. Our apartment was only a block from two main roadways, once of which—Ferrell Parkway—was a main traffic artery. Mindful of the danger to even a hefty beast like Poppy, I worked hard to keep him indoors. He fought and moped. His attention to the door became obsessive. When we brought home a shy kitten named Shadow, his jealousy made the situation even worse. I decided to let him out onto our second-floor balcony. What could be the harm? After all, he couldn’t jump from that height…could he?

He could. Two days later, the urge toward freedom became too great and he did jump. He was unharmed by his leap, and bolted across the lawn and out of sight. As his absence stretched to a day, then two, then past his record of four days, I became increasingly worried.

Sorry, there is no happy ending. I never saw Poppy again.

I still miss my renegade feline. He was so desperate for what he saw as freedom, though, that he refused to accept my greater wisdom. He refused to remain with me. I’ve tried to convince myself that he found a home more to his liking. In my heart of hearts, though, I fear his willfulness led him to a lonely and painful end.

Poppy’s attitude isn’t unique among creation. Nor are cats in general the only creatures to think there must be something better beyond a closed door. It’s an old, old story.

“And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it, you shall surely die’” (Genesis 2:16-17, ESV).

We all know what happened next. (If you don’t remember the details, you can find the story in Genesis 3.) When you look at it, God gave Adam and Eve a pretty wide boundary. They weren’t restricted to eat from only one tree and leave the rest. No, they were allowed to choose from all the fruit of creation. In all creation, there was only one thing they were not to do. That one boundary proved too much.

As a result of their actions, all of humanity still lives east of Eden. We still reach out our hands, pushing God’s boundaries to the breaking point. Cain killed Able. Noah had to build the ark. Even Abraham, the great patriarch who is commended for his faith in Hebrews 11, stepped beyond God’s will at least once, when he decided not to wait for God’s promise and had a child by Hagar instead (Genesis 16).

David, a man after God’s own heart, pushed the boundaries (2 Samuel 11). The Israelites did it, over and over again. It happened in the early Church. It happens today, in each one of us, as we hate our neighbors instead of loving them; as we lie to our spouses; as we cheat employers, customers or the government; as we call evil good. Christians do it as we place work or ministry ahead of family, as we fail to draw the line between sin and still-loved sinner, as we keep silent out of fear…or speak from our own anger instead of God’s. We step beyond God’s will and push past God’s closed doors…too often into our own destruction.

In all of history, only Christ didn’t willfully push by God’s barriers and fall into sin. Not that he wasn’t tempted. The record is there in Matthew 4 and Luke 4. That’s where God’s saving grace comes in. The writer of Hebrews says of Jesus,

“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (4:15-16, ESV).

We shouldn’t break through God’s boundaries; that’s obvious. We all do it, though. We can’t help ourselves. The good news is that, unlike Poppy, we have a chance to undo what we’ve done. It’s called confession. When we see how far we’ve stepped out of God’s will and desire to step back into His light (1 John 1:5-7), Jesus is there to pull us in and mend fences.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

On the other hand, “If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us” (1 John 1:10).

Yes, we can keep pushing…and pushing…and pushing. If we do, we’ll get exactly what we want; separation from God and a life that’s spinning further and further away from Him (that’s the definition of hell; did you know?). If we turn, though, and walk back toward that light, we’re more like Shadow coming back into the bedroom. And doesn’t a warm spot on the bed sound much nicer?

Come Down from the Roof

2010-10-28T18:54:00.005-05:00

Trusting God’s Direction…or Not

When we lived in Virginia Beach, we never let Shadow out the front door. The danger was too great. Dogs, cat-hating neighbors, speeding cars…too many deadly terrors awaited a timid little cat. Instead, we let her out on our second-story balcony. She could sniff the air and stalk bugs without fear.

Even in the safety of the railed balcony, however, a loud or unrecognized sound sent her bolting indoors.

When we moved to a farm in Oregon, we expanded Shadow’s horizons. During warm spring days we let—okay, shoved—her out the door and into the yard. No dangers lurked there in daylight. She encountered few cars, a playful dog, many friendly cats and no neighbors. Our feline owner was free to delight in new scents and textures, to scamper after butterflies and meander through a jungle of tomato plants. We trusted her natural timidity to keep her close so we could retrieve her when darkness ushered in the dangers of night.

Boy, were we right. Well, partly.

In Shadow’s mind, the green expanse of yard offered too little cover. Lilac bushes presented opportunities to be ambushed, not welcome shade. Bugs were monsters and other animals were, of course, anathema.

Our timid Shadow abandoned the bright environs of the yard for what were, to her, safer climes. Every night we had to seek her out in the machine shop, in the woodshed, in a pile of abandoned telephone poles or rusted metal, in whatever dark hole she had chosen as her refuge.

Then she discovered the roof.

It was easy to access the roof. Well, easy for a cat. A clamber up the old apricot tree, a leap to the dormer, and she was there. The yard with all its imagined dangers lay far below her. Shadow’s world became an expanse of gray shingles under an open sky. She had no access to food and no water. She found too little shade when it was sunny and too little shelter when it stormed. She was hot, thirsty, hungry, lonely…and safe. There she stayed until we pulled out a ladder or removed a screen to come for her.

Come for her we did, always. Every nice day, we popped her out the door again, hoping she would learn to trust our knowledge, to trust us. Every night we had to seek her out in her high places.

I have had times in my life—more than I’m happy to recall—when I’ve shown similar behavior. I’ve staked out my patch of roof and stayed there despite God’s calls to come down and experience something better. This is not unique to me. It’s so common that we’ve developed a cliché for it: “stuck in a rut.” Rut or roof, it’s much the same. We are lonely, thirsty, hungry and battered by the elements but we are…safe.

At least, we think we are.

God, though, calls us to something higher. (Forgive the pun; it was unintended!) Perhaps I should say, God calls us to something vaster. He opens the door into a green expanse and urges us to step through.

“Don’t worry,” He says. “I’ve checked it out. There’s nothing out there you can’t handle.”

Time after time, we pull back or retreat to our rooftops. We dig in our heels and wail about the unfairness of our dreary lives. All the while, we miss the sunny stretch of greater faith, wider love and deeper relationship that goes along with taking that step.

Sticking to the rooftops isn’t a 21st century phenomenon. The history of Israel in the Old Testament is full of places where the Israelites turned from God and went to high places…literally. High places, the tops of hills and mountains, were where other nations built altars to pagan gods. Israel inevitably, time after time, picked up the high places and the pagan worship that went with them.

“In every town in Judah he built high places to burn sacrifices to other gods and provoked the LORD, the God of his fathers, to anger” (2 Chronicles 28:25 NIV).

“They angered him with their high places; they aroused his jealousy with their idols” (Psalm 78:58 NIV).

Yes, as with any kind of faithlessness, Israel’s abandonment aroused God’s anger. And he expressed it through prophets like Jeremiah, Ezekiel and Hosea.

“The high places of wickedness will be destroyed— it is the sin of Israel. Thorns and thistles will grow up and cover their altars. Then they will say to the mountains, ‘Cover us!’ and to the hills, ‘Fall on us!’” (Hosea 10:8 NIV)

Our high places, unlike Shadow’s and the Israelites, aren’t often literal. They express the same thing, though. They all express a deep and abiding lack of faith. The Israelites didn’t think their God was enough, so they added a few more gods…or abandoned the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob altogether. Shadow doesn’t trust my word that the yard is safe, so she looks for higher ground. We don’t have faith that God will guide and protect us wherever He leads us, so we dig in our heels. Remember what God says when He opens that door?

“Don’t worry. I’ve checked it out. There’s nothing out there you can’t handle.”

Or, similar to what Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it” (1 Cor. 10:13 NIV).

Whether we endure trials or break new ground in faith, God calls us to step out in trust. We all too often say. “No thanks, God. Have you seen the size of the dogs in this neighborhood? I’ll stay where I am.”

But God doesn’t call us to stay put. He never has. The New Testament is short on graphic threats toward high places, but the God of Israel still calls us to faith. He calls us to Him. He calls us to run faster, dig deeper, trust more. One of the places the Bible expresses this most eloquently is in Hebrews 11, the “faith” chapter.

“And what more should I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets—who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions, quenched raging fire, escaped the edge of the sword, won strength out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. …. Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us.” (Heb. 11:32-34; 12:1)

A rooftop can't hold a racetrack. God wants us race toward Him; He wants us to come down from our spiritual rooftops. He wants us to come down so He can lead us up in His own time. Yes, he wants to lead us up, but to the mountaintops, not the rooftops. First, though, we need to climb back down the apricot tree. We need to step into the yard.

Will Work for Tuna #3

2010-10-14T12:42:00.003-05:00

If Grace Abounds, Why Bother?

This is the third and, I think, final installment of that can of worms I opened at the beginning of September...grace versus works. We continue from the last post with Question #2: If I don’t have to work for tuna, why should I work at all? Why not do as Joe Black is doing in this picture, kicking back and relaxing in the sun?

Or, as the Apostle Paul says in Romans 6:1, ”Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase?” (NIV).

Shadow and some of her compatriots may have the answer to that. (Paul has some pretty good thoughts, too, but we’ll look at Shadow first. After all, this is her blog.).

Cats, like people, seem to have a few basic motivations. Hunger and thirst, fear, defense of family, sex drive…all the basics are there. As with humans, different impulses can drive seemingly similar behaviors. Then again, that actually makes the behavior different, doesn’t it? There’s a big difference between stalking a mouse because you’re hungry--because you have to--and stalking that same mouse because you think your human may appreciate a small gift.

You know what I’m talking about, right? Most of us have heard of, if not been owned by, gift-giving cats. We may not need their gifts of mice, snakes and crickets (or appreciate them much, either.) We can appreciate, however, the impulse that drives a small feline to drop a gift at the feet of its human.

In the last post, I talked about the fact that God doesn’t need our good works any more than I need that snake B.J. just brought into the kitchen. In this case, though, you might say it’s the thought that counts. What thought is that? Gratitude.

To put it another way, the relationship between works and faith is a matter of perspective. Salvation and works go together. Yes, they do. According to James, if you’re not doing what God says, your faith may be in doubt.

“But be doers of the word, and not merely hearers who deceive themselves. For if any are hearers of the word and not doers, they are like those who look at themselves in a mirror; for they look at themselves and, on going away, immediately forget what they were like (James 1:22-24, NRSV).

Or, if you want it put more bluntly, “So faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead” (James 2:17, NRSV).

Which comes first, though, salvation or works? In the last couple of posts, I think Shadow and I made it clear that works don’t lead to salvation. So, it must be the other way around. It’s faith and salvation that lead to doing what God says. Let’s let Paul now answer his own question: should we sin more to get more grace?

“By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?” (Romans 6:2, NIV)

Paul was big on grace. He was also faced with new Christians who thought that, now that they had grace on their side, they could do whatever the heck they wanted. (They had a lot in common with many people today.) Paul had a few compelling arguments in the face of that belief.

“What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted. You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.” (Romans 6:15-18, NIV)

The thought of slavery may not rest well in minds today, but another way to view the relationship between faith and works is as fruit. That’s the imagery Christ Himself used when talking to the disciples.

“I am the vine, and my Father is the vinegrower. He removes every branch in me that bears no fruit” (John 15:1-2a).

It’s not just “good deeds” Christ is talking about here, but spiritual fruit. (See Galatians 5:22-26 for more information on that.) From the spiritual, though, comes the physical. Obeying the law, doing good things, works…they’re natural extensions of a relationship with God, blossoming and ripening as naturally as a pear tree loads its branches with juicy pears. It’s the tree’s molecular makeup that makes it a pear tree, but it’s the fruit that makes that fact obvious to the world.

We’ve already established that we can’t obey God’s laws under our own steam, though. So, how are we supposed to produce these Divine apples? Jesus, as always, has the simplest and most difficult answer.

“Abide in me as I abide in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me....And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name” (John 15: 4, 16b).

Remember, saplings don’t bear fruit; mature trees and vines do. It’s time spent connected to—“abiding” in—the vine that produces abundant fruit. And what does it mean to abide in Jesus? It means keeping in touch with God by praying and reading the Bible. It means staying plugged in to a group of other faithful Christians and learning from those whose faith is bearing more fruit than yours.

Abiding in Christ means keeping His commandments (John 15:10). His most basic commandment is to love one another as He loves us (John 15:12).

Once you comprehend the truly awesome extent of God’s love for you—the poor, homeless, beaten, exhausted, sweating, bleeding, dying love—it becomes more simple to love in turn. Not always easy, but simple. Simple to love God enough to do what He says. Simple to value your relationships with God and those around you. And “On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets” (Matt. 22:40).

Will Work for Tuna #2

2010-10-04T17:13:00.004-05:00

Why Have the Coins if You Don't Need to Pay?

I can’t believe it’s been a month since I last posted anything to this blog. I apologize to my few followers, and hope the delay hasn’t put anyone out too much. (Shadow, on the other hand, doesn’t care at all.)

It’s been a tough month to find time to think and reflect…hence the delay. Also, it means that this post, coming late, isn’t as well thought-out as usual. Again, my apologies. I hope it still offers a little something in the way of hope and encouragement.

So, my last post talked about how it’s impossible to keep a ledger with God. That raises several more questions, though. If we can’t get to heaven by what we do, if there is no balance sheet, then what part do works really play in our relationship with God? After all, the Bible has all those “rules.”

Question #1: What are those rules for, if not a stair-step list of heavenly requirements? If God doesn’t need us to do good things, then why did He tell us to do those good things?

Two reasons come to mind.

First, life really does work better under some conditions than others. Life works better if cats…

• Use their litter boxes so their humans don’t have to clean up messes behind the couch.
• Catch mice so humans don’t have to set traps or face starvation.
• Leave the couch alone so it looks like a couch and not a bad knitting project.
• Stay off the cupboards and don’t eat things that will kill them.

Those rules don’t hurt the cat; they make life easier for all involved. In the same way, life works better if humans value life, value relationships with each other, and value their relationships with the Creator who created them. Simple, really. I’m going to quote from the Jesus Storybook Bible again. Ready?

“’I want you to love me more than anything else in all the world -- and know that I love you too,’ God told them. ‘That’s the most important thing of all.’

“God gave them other rules, like don’t make yourselves pretend gods; don’t kill people; or steal; or lie. The rules showed God’s people how to live, and how to be close to him, and how to be happy. They showed how life worked best.”*

Second, when we try to live by the rules, we realize how much we need God’s grace.

The Storybook Bible continues:

“’God promises to always look after you,’ Moses said. ‘Will you love him and keep these rules?’

“’We can do it! Yes! We promise!’

“But they were wrong. They couldn’t do it. No matter how hard they tried, they could never keep God’s rules all the time.

“God knew they couldn’t. And he wanted them to know it, too.

“Only one Person could keep all the rules. And many years later God would send him -- to stand in their place and be perfect for them.

“Because rules couldn’t save them.

“Only God could save them.”

You can think of all those rules as a kind of mirror. Looking into it shows us not how clean and pure we are, but how dirty and in need of a good, old-fashioned scrubbing down. In Romans 5, Paul explains, “But law came in, with the result that the trespass multiplied; but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more” (Romans 5:20, NRSV).

The more we try to follow the law, the worse we see we are. The worse we are, the more grace we need. The more grace we need, the more God supplies. Beautiful, isn’t it?

On the other hand, if you insist on trying to work your way to salvation, even knowing all this, the consequences are very different. When speaking to Christians who contemplated being circumcised under Jewish law, Paul had this to say:

“You who want to be justified by the law have cut yourselves off from Christ; you have fallen away from grace” (Galatians 5:4, NRSV).

So, good works--the law--are no substitute for God’s forgiveness. The law simply shows you how much you need forgiveness. The absolutely great news it that forgiveness is there, freely supplied for all who will take it.

“For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ” (John 1:17, NIV).

*The Jesus Storybook Bible, pgs. 105-107. Sally Lloyd-Jones. Zonderkidz, 2007.

Will Work for Tuna

2010-08-28T22:06:00.003-05:00

Keeping a Balance Sheet with God

I get the feeling our cats think we owe them something.

It’s not my imagination. Each one of our cohabitators—Shadow, Missy, B.J. et al—say it differently. The message is always the same, though. The slitted glance of irritation, the strident yowling, the histrionics and starvation throes when food isn’t in the bowl on demand. It’s not supplication; it’s expectation. Every graceful line and snooty glare tells the tale. The cat has been keeping a ledger, and I’m in the red. Time to tally up.

B.J. is the worst. I can almost see him don his bookie’s visor as he barters around a half-smoked cigar:

“Okay, buster, that’s four mice and one bird eradicated. You owe me six months of canned food.”

“Wait, you killed a bird? What kind…”

“Listen, I don’t care if you didn’t want the bird killed, see?” His eyes narrow, daring me to disagree. “I killed it and you owe me…two months of food, ‘cause it’s harder to kill a bird than a mouse.”

I start sweating under the glare of the single, bare bulb. “But…”

“Oh, and I only missed the litter box twice this month. At one can of tuna per act of obedience, that…” ka-ching! “…two hundred thirty-eight cans. Cough it up.”

Yes, of course it’s ridiculous. B. J. doesn’t wear a visor. Still, we often don our own loan shark attitudes as we try to strong-arm similar bargains with God. I was reminded of that when a neighbor stopped by after work one morning. My father bade her sit while he popped a piece of bread in the toaster. As he handed her the toast, she said gratefully, “You’ll go to heaven for this.”

“You don’t go to heaven for good works,” my dad said.

“Oh,” the neighbor waved her hand dismissively, “I don’t believe that.”

That little vignette isn’t meant to disparage a perfectly kind and generous neighbor. It’s simply an example of an attitude that is common among Christians and unbelievers alike. I don’t know if there’s a human on earth, myself included, who wouldn’t love to prove God owes us something.

“Yes, God, I’ve been keeping a ledger, and You owe me an all-expense-paid trip to heaven.”

It doesn’t end there. We often seem to think we have the right to bargain with the Divine over every act of charity or self-control we exhibit…no matter how many times we fall short.

“I’ve tithed a full ten percent for the past year, God. You owe me a 5% salary increase. Give me an unexpected windfall and we’ll call it even.”

“Wait, didn’t I give…”

“Oh, and I got cut off three times on my way to work last week, and I didn’t flip one of them the bird. Plus, I let someone in front of me during rush hour. That should put a couple extra rooms on that heavenly mansion, right?”

No, there aren’t many among us who wouldn’t like to pretend we’ve done something to earn our salvation. Unfortunately for that delusion, we were born in the red.

That’s not a popular thought. We all, like Anne Frank, want to believe that people are basically good at heart. The Bible tells a different tale. From Genesis to Revelation, we’re reminded that humans are sinful…hardly in a position to bargain with God. The most succinct statements of this are probably in the book of Romans.

“There is no one who is righteous, not even one…” (3:9b).

“For there is no distinction, since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God…” (3:22b-23).

Bad news for that ledger I was keeping.

Maybe you’ve been taught that you do have to work your way to heaven. Maybe no one has ever told you that you can’t. If that’s the case, you probably don’t know that you don’t have to.

“…since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God; they are now justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus…” (Romans 3:23-24).

Or, as the apostle Peter writes:

“He himself bore our sins in his body on the cross, so that, free from sins, we might live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. For you were going astray like sheep, but you have returned to the shepherd and guardian of your souls” (1 Peter 2:24-25).

No, we can’t work our way to heaven or run a balance sheet with God, because He gives us salvation as a gift.

Shadow and B.J. don’t really have a hold over me; they have no collateral to make me give them good things. No collateral but my love for them. That’s all it takes. Of course I give them the things they need…not just the necessities, but also the pleasures. I do that not because of the number of mice they’ve killed or the lack of bad behavior, but because I value their happiness.

God values our happiness, so He’s already given us what we could never buy. That’s a speed bump for many. It’s far easier to believe we can earn our way into God’s good graces than to think we’ll never be good enough on our own. But it’s only by burning our ledger and realizing God is keeping an entirely different set of books that we’ll ever be able to receive the gift of …balance paid.

We can’t bargain our way into what God offers freely. Thank God we don’t have to.

Sorry

2010-08-06T11:08:00.001-05:00

Due to vacation time and the general craziness of life, Shadow and I are on hiatus for the month. Look for a new post on the first of September.

Thanks for understanding, and God bless!

Waiting at the Window

2010-07-14T17:48:00.005-05:00

Being Alert for the Master’s Return

Doesn't B.J. look alert?

When we lived in Virginia, our bedroom window overlooked the street and our designated parking spaces. An armchair backed against the window and soaked up the afternoon light. It was there that Shadow waited for me to get home each day.

I saw her there every day, a familiar silhouette against the glass as I pulled into my space and climbed out of the car. By the time I made my way up the sidewalk and the flight of steps to our apartment door, she was there. She was always there, at the door, waiting for me.

She never missed a day. Whether I got off work early or worked late, she was there. She was always diligent, always eager, always happy to be greeted in turn with a quick cuddle and a handful of treats. We’ve already seen that Shadow’s preferred spot is by my side, and as close to my side as possible. Those weekday hours must have seemed long to her, stuck in our two-bedroom by herself. Even with food and water, soft pillows and numerous toys, she knew something was missing. Nothing could take the place of her human, and she waited eagerly for my return.

I often feel my endurance isn’t as long as Shadow’s. Sure, I know my Master is going to come walking through the door some day, but I’m not sure when. Until then, there are lots of balls to bat, lots of catnip to sniff and kibble to eat, and lots of soft cushions that simply beg me to take a quick catnap. Lulled by the provisions my Master has left for me, I suddenly find I’m not quite as anxious for His return as I once was.

Jesus urged a more active form of waiting, though.

“Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning, like men waiting for their master to return from a wedding banquet, so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them watching when he comes” (Luke 12:35-37a, NIV).

So, I shouldn’t be taking a quick nap in the corner. I, like Shadow, should be watching at the door for the love of my life to appear. Kind of like the five wise virgins in Matthew 25:1-13. Don’t remember the story? Here it is:

"At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Five of them were foolish and five were wise. The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. The wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep.

"At midnight the cry rang out: 'Here's the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!'

"Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. The foolish ones said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.'

" 'No,' they replied, 'there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.'

"But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut.
"Later the others also came. 'Sir! Sir!' they said. 'Open the door for us!'

"But he replied, 'I tell you the truth, I don't know you.'

"Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.”

I suppose the lesson I take from this is expectation. Even the wise virgins fell asleep, but a light sleeper can wake up quickly. A napping cat who knows her human will be there any moment can be at the door in a flash.

Christ knows every temptation we face. He knows how difficult it is to be wide-awake and diligent all the time. Still, He told these parables because He knows that what’s coming is worth waiting for. We’re not awaiting a human master, or even a human spouse. We’re not waiting in expectation for someone who could just as easily be grumpy from a bad day at work as cheerful and loving. Yes, we’re waiting for our master, but we’re waiting for so much more…the loving arms to keep us safe, the bridegroom, the heroic prince, the knight in shining armor. And when He comes,

“...he will wipe every tear from their eyes.
Death will be no more;
mourning and crying and pain will be no more,
for the first things have passed away” (Rev. 21:4, NRSV)

Isn’t that a beautiful promise? Or, in the words of one of my new favorite books, “Everything sad has come untrue.”*

That’s not an event to dread; no scene from an end-of-days horror movie. It’s certainly not something to sleep through. No, that’s something to keep us waiting at the window!

*The Jesus Storybook Bible, pg 347. Sally Lloyd Jones, Zondervan, 2007.

But My Neighbor is a DOG!

2010-07-01T10:52:00.006-05:00

When We Don’t Love Our Neighbors as Ourselves

Have you ever met a “friendly”? If you’ve been around a variety of cats, you probably have. Let me explain.

Friendlies are the cats who love everybody. A friendly doesn’t know such things as strangers exist. My parents have a barn cat named Dixie who is like that. Like Will Rogers, she’s never met a cat, dog, human or housefly she didn’t like. If left to herself, Dixie’s friendly naiveté would probably get her killed one day…if her people weren’t looking after her.

Shadow has no such issues. It took her weeks to warm up to me when we brought her home as a kitten. It took four years to form an uneasy truce between her and my husband. She had never been abused; she simply has a suspicious nature. As far as Shadow is concerned, she has a small family and no neighbors. She’s a stranger in a strange land, a tulip in the desert, a boll weevil in Nome, Alaska. The species doesn’t matter. If it’s too big to pick on—so anything larger than a cricket—it’s big enough to fear or disdain.

Separate ends of the spectrum, Dixie and Shadow. Their polar oppositions are good lessons for us, though. Where do we fall on that Dixie-to-Shadow scale? Are we the friendlies, or the suspicious minds?

Too often, I think we follow Shadow’s neurotic cue. I’m not just talking about picking up saw-carrying hitchhikers, either. As we carry on our daily activities, we sometimes treat those we encounter more as potential serial killers than as beloved neighbors.

“But I’m not a bad person,” you may be saying. “I’m just careful.”

That’s true. Whether we’re talking about Shadow, me or you, most unlovely behavior isn’t driven by a desire to harm. It’s fear, pure and simple. Even in our churches and families, it’s easy to let self-preservation conquer self-sacrifice. But that’s not an adequate excuse. We have the most direct of commands to the contrary.

“The second [commandment] is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:31).

“In everything do to others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12).

“Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44).

Or, how about a parable, much quoted but not often lived?

On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?"

"What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"

He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

"You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."

But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?"

In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

"Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"

The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him."

Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise." (Luke 10:25-37, NIV)

It’s not always easy. Fear is a powerful motivator. Often, fear is the most powerful motivator. But “perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18). We can’t achieve such perfection on our own. Fortunately, we have something Shadow doesn’t…an author and perfector of our faith, who didn’t let fear keep Him from His appointment with the cross. Rather, love was what drove him there. If we show a fraction of that love to our fellow beings, a slight overflow from that pool of Divine love, we can change the world.

So, let’s remember that and take our cue from Dixie rather than Shadow. Let’s be a bit more friendly to our neighbors!

Was I Not Supposed to Do That?

2010-06-15T10:07:00.004-05:00

Purposeful Disobedience to God’s Will

If you live with a cat, you’ve seen it…the saunter, the glance over the shoulder to see if anyone’s watching. Then it happens. “It” might be different for every cat. For Shadow, it is the sinking of her claws into a piece of nice furniture. For your feline companion, it might be the leap to the countertop or curling up inside the baby’s crib. Whatever “it” is, it’s against the rules. More importantly, the feline knows it!

Yes, she knows when she’s doing something wrong. If she’s done it before, she’s been told…over and over and over again. Yet she keeps on with the behavior. She scratches the couch, jumps on the counter, gets cat hair on the baby’s sheets. And that little glance over the shoulder? That tells the whole story.

“It’s not wrong,” she says. “It’s not wrong if I don’t get caught.”

Like Shadow, we sometimes forget that we have a pretty smart Master. While we may seem omniscient (all-knowing) to a 12-inch-high cat, our Master really is all-knowing. Yes, He knows when we misbehave. More importantly, He knows we know better.

We may be higher on the food chain than our four-pawed companions, but we often don’t show a whole lot more sense when it comes to being repeat offenders. Whenever I see Shadow do something for which she’s previously experienced consequences—a scolding, a swat on the rump, or getting tossed on the porch—I have to shake my head in wonderment. Why doesn’t she get it? Why doesn’t she realize I don’t like that behavior? Why doesn’t she give up the fight and live in harmony with me?

God must wonder the same thing. According to Psalm 33:15, He made our hearts: “…he who fashions the hearts of them all…” How often does He shake His head over what we choose to do with those hearts? Does He ever think, Why don’t they just live in harmony with me?

Every good master, human or Divine, wants to live in harmony with an obedient creature. Like Shadow’s actions, our purposeful disobedience comes with consequences.

“For if we willfully persist in sin after having received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful prospect of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries” (Hebrews 10:26-27).

When we insist and persist in scratching suede sofas, jumping on the counter to eat butter, gossiping, lying, sleeping around…well, there are consequences.

Sometimes those consequences are visible as a direct result of our behavior. They show up as the scratched tatters of ruined friendships, communicable diseases, fractured churches and broken marriages. Sometimes they’re invisible to the world, causing guilt and inner turmoil that we succeed in hiding from those around us. No matter, though; God always sees them. When we see the line in the sand and cross it anyway, we stretch a strand in our connection to God. As his beloved creatures, we still have a connection, but it’s weaker. Just like when Shadow thumbs her nose at my rules. I still love her, but life isn’t quite as comfortable for either of us.

Notice also that, through all of this, the Master never moved. It’s the cat, the creature, that crossed that line and strained the relationship.

Next time you’re tempted to do something against which you’ve been warned, sit down, take the time to groom yourself, and think. Is the softness of that particular mattress worth the scolding you’ll get? Is the taste of that scintillating morsel worth the Master’s wrath? Is it worth breaking His heart?

Further Reading: 1 John (Yes, the whole book…it’s short!)

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Don't Look at Me!

2010-05-31T20:52:00.003-05:00

Hiding from God’s Grace

When Shadow does something wrong, like scratching a piece of furniture or marking that particular spot along the baseboard, she knows it. She’s doesn’t experience repentance and contrition, though. With the knowledge of her wrongdoing comes one thought: to not get caught.

If you live with cats, you’ve seen this yourself. First you see the feline happily scratching away, claws buried luxuriously in the tweed of a sofa or the leather of your favorite recliner. Next comes the realization that they aren’t alone, that there’s another presence in the room. Then starts the frantic pulling as the cat attempts to flee the face of punishment. Of course, if your cat companion is like Shadow, progress is impeded by an errant claw stuck in the tempting fabric, like a child with a fist caught in the proverbial cookie jar. Nevertheless, once free from the scene of the crime, Shadow bolts for a spot under the bed or behind the couch, certain she’s about to be—horror of horrors!—scolded.

It's both amusing and frustrating to watch a cat run from you that way. If the crime is severe, you have to turn the house upside-down to make the feline face the consequences so you can get back to cuddling. When the guilt is imaginary, as it sometimes is, you laugh and wish the cat would come out of hiding so you could show her everything is all right. The cat’s instinct, though, works against you.

I don’t know if you remember, but the Bible tells a similar story…right in Genesis 3.

“They heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden at the time of the evening breeze, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man, and said to him, ‘Where are you?’ He said, ‘I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.’” (Genesis 3:8-10)

The story of the temptation and fall of Even and Adam shows immediate consequences. They now feel they have a reason to fear God, and they hide from Him. Of course, this was no imagined sense of guilt. Adam and Eve had broken God’s one commandment, and they were busted. They deserved punishment, and they knew it. God knew it even better than they did. He did punish them, by driving them from the garden. Yet, if you read on, you can see that God was already setting the stage for His grace to pour out on humanity. He told the snake,

“I will put enmity between you and the woman,
and between your offspring and hers;
he will strike your head,
and you will strike his heel” (Genesis 3:15).

Notice that this seed of a promise comes before God speaks His curse over Adam and Eve. And that brings us to the point. When the guilty pair hid from God’s punishment, they also hid from God’s grace.

When Shadow hides from my “punishment,” she also hides herself from my love. This is sad when she deserves a reprimand, but all the more tragic when there’s no punishment coming at all.

Like Shadow, we’re sometimes so intent on hiding our sins from God—or hiding ourselves from God—that we never give him the chance to pour out that love and grace He sent us through Jesus. At the very least, we make Him turn the house and garden upside-down to find us!

How are you hiding from God’s grace today?
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Keep Knocking, Keep Meowing

2010-05-14T16:51:00.002-05:00

Ask and You Shall Receive

Have you ever tried to ignore a cat?

If you have, then you know it’s impossible.

No creature on earth is better at ignoring the world when it wants to be alone. All it takes, though, is a want—a need—and this bellybutton-gazing feline become a screeching maniac intent on shattering your inner eardrum.

As someone who has been under cat ownership for a long time, I’ve noticed the timing is not always convenient. It may be the middle of the night, four in the morning, or right when you’re in the middle of some important task. Cats, in general, don’t care. Shadow, specifically, cares even less.

It could be a need as basic as food or water (or, heaven forbid it, being cut off from the litter box!). Maybe it’s a case of separation anxiety or the need for a little space.

Whatever it is, you’ve probably seen the pattern. It starts with an earnest gaze and a slight meow. If ignored, the cat switches to an in-your-face posture and a mid-range meow. Soon, it escalates to operatic posturing, torn screens and shredded pant legs.

As an example, while living with my parents, we tried to acclimate Shadow to spending days outside when the weather was nice. This resulted in a siren-like wail of despair and a visit to every window within reach, complete with claw marks on screen doors and various martyr-like poses that continued until she was let back into the house.

All of these antics can be annoying, but they do prove one thing. Cats don’t have any problem understanding what Jesus means when he says:

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks, it will be opened.” ~ Luke 11:9-10

In fact, the strident persistence of Shadow and her feline relations brings to mind the parable of the unjust judge and the persistent widow in Luke 18.

Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said: "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, 'Grant me justice against my adversary.' For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, 'Even though I don't fear God or care about men, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!'" And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?" (Luke 18:1-8)

So, maybe Shadow isn’t so far off. She’s doing exactly what God wants us to do when we’re in need…showing persistence in her request and faith in the outcome.

Of course, there are times when what we ask for may not be in our best interest. Maybe that request is a want, but not a need. James 4:3 says, "You ask and do not receive because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures." After all, kitty treats aren’t the same as food and water. A neurotic need for a soft cushion isn’t the same as basic shelter, or even love.

At the same time, we should realize what Shadow obviously knows: if you ask a loving master to meet your needs, your needs will be met. So, keep knocking, keep meowing, keep praying. Ask, and it will be given to you.
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I Don't Trust You THAT Much

2010-05-01T16:07:00.002-05:00

Losing Faith in Stressful Times

Few feelings are as pleasurable for a cat person as the sensation that comes when your feline is curled up next to or on top of you. Your companion’s purrs rumble through your body and make you feel as if you share some mystic connection. Adoring eyes gaze at you in contentment and trust. Nothing, you’re sure, could ever break this bond.

Then the doorbell rings.

Where did your cat go? She was here a moment ago, telegraphing her faith and love in tangible waves. Now, she’s notably absent.

Okay, maybe your cat has a more trusting nature than Shadow does. My feline owner’s trust in me, though, has marked boundaries. Remember, she’s neurotic, and not all that outgoing. Infinite trust turns to doubt when a stranger walks in the door.

I remember one occasion in particular. My husband and I invited friends over for a teaching exercise he had to do for graduate school. Predictably, Shadow disappeared as the first guest arrived. My boss, Cynthia, was among the first to arrive. A fellow cat lover, she’d heard numerous stories about Shadow’s escapades. So, as she looked around, she wanted to know what I’d done with my cat.

I found Shadow under our bed, pulled her out and presented her to my employer. Eyes huge, ears flat, every nerve in Shadow’s body tightened. Though she was stiff with rigor mortis-like tension, the moment was peaceful enough until the doorbell heralded the arrival of another guest.

Shadow flew out of my arms. I earned several scratches in the process, and Cynthia received her first gray hair. Shadow’s trust was stretched beyond her endurance, and she bolted. A nanosecond later, no one would have known a cat had been in the room.

Shadow’s trust, which seemed so complete in quiet evenings by the fire, turned out to be conditional. Yes, she trusted me…but not that much.

Looking from the height of our superior knowledge, it seems silly that a cat wouldn’t trust a loving human. Sure, an abusive human earns distrust, but I’m not abusive. Doesn’t that silly Shadow realize that this human, who hold’s the feline’s life in her hands, has the cat’s best interests at heart?

Doesn’t that deserve complete trust?

Too often, though, my faith, or lack of faith, in God is every bit as conditional as Shadow’s faith in me. As long as the waters are smooth, I’m content to “trust” God with my belongings, my family and my life. When troubles ring my doorbell, though, I’m suddenly absent. When God finds me hiding under the bed, the conversation goes something like this:

“Child, come out; there’s something I want to show you.”

“Are you crazy, God?” I inch further under the bed and find a stray quilt to bury myself in. “There’s trouble out there.”

“It’s not dangerous,” says God. “Not as long as I’m with you.”

“Sorry, God. I don’t trust you that much.”

If the imagery seems silly, stop and think about it. How often have you found yourself facing a trial of health or finance or relationship, only to turn your back on God and draw on your own reserves to face the crisis? How often do we respond with outright anger when faced with circumstances we’d rather avoid?

In 1 Corinthians 10:13b, Paul tells us, “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength, but with the testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.” Still, our gut reaction is usually to argue rather than trust.

“But I lost my job, God! How will I pay my bills?”

“Trust me.”

“I love that person, God. How will I live without them?”

“Trust me.”

“If I speak up for my faith, I’ll be fired!”

“Trust me.”

“Move to a strange city without having a place to live? Are you crazy, God?”

Maybe we don’t hear God’s voice in such an audible way. Still, God’s response is simple. “But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the over, will he not much more clothe you – you of little faith?” (Matt. 6:30) In Psalm 37, God says, “Do not fret because of the wicked; do not be envious of wrongdoers, for they will soon fade like the grass…”

Yes, from the height of God’s understanding, our lack of trust must seem silly. We have a God who spoke the universe into existence, who can hold the whole universe in the palm of His hand, yet who cared enough to suffer and die for us. It does seem as if we could give Him some credit.

It does seem as if we could trust Him that much.

I’m Sorry, Did You Want to Be Alone?

2010-04-14T17:01:00.003-05:00

Sticking Close to God

It’s perhaps a sign of a troubled kittenhood, some innate insecurity, that makes Shadow stick to me like…well, like a shadow. Dogs are normally credited with staying on their masters’ heels, but I’ve known many cats that were just as insistent on keeping their humans within paw’s reach. Shadow takes the habit to the point of the neurotic.

If I’m in the kitchen, she’s there, sniffing around her food bowls or watching me at the stove. If I’m on the porch, she’s feeling the breeze and checking out the tomatoes. When I clean the house, she finds a perch to observe and supervise. By far her most annoying habit is her tendency to sprawl across the keyboard while I’m at the computer. Perhaps the most difficult adjustment is her habit of slipping into the bathroom right before the door closes and hanging out while I take care of business. She maintains a small bubble of personal space, but not much.

It’s flattering, actually. What more sincere sign of affection than showing you want to be with someone all…the…time?

While humans often reach the breaking point and crave alone time (especially true for the introverts among us), what God craves is time with us. Sadly, we’re the ones who wander off after butterflies and dust bunnies, deserting our roles as faithful companions and followers.

Despite the inconvenience of tripping over furry bodies, stepping on a wayward tail, or going to the bathroom with an audience, I miss my shadow when she’s not there. In my heart of hearts, I believe God feels the same way about His wayward children. The Bible is full of His attempts to get our attention and re-establish the relationship we broke, all culminating in his ultimate sacrifice on the cross.

It probably borders on sacrilegious to think of following God to the bathroom, but isn’t that the point? Our attitude should be that of Ruth to Naomi, or of a neurotic gray cat to her human.

“Wherever you go, I will go” (Ruth 1:16).

Lead the way, God.

Oops! I Meant to Do That

2010-03-31T13:08:00.003-05:00

Pride in Ourselves Instead of God

Cats are among the most graceful of God’s creatures. Animal ballet dancers, they combine the grace and fragility of fine porcelain with the athletic power of a professional athlete. Even these finely honed Olympians, though sometimes stumble. When they do lose their footing, they do so spectacularly!

You’ve probably seen the funny videos of cats warming themselves over aquarium lights, only to roll over and fall into the water below. How about the montages of cats leaping and missing, stepping into thin air or getting caught in paper bags? Yes, cats know how to embarrass themselves.

Shadow is, herself, a bit on the bumbling side. Whether it’s due to her natural timidity or an inner ear infection, there are times when a precarious perch leaves her uncertain. Even when she looks confident and poised, though, her actions can end in an inglorious fall. A graceful step to the edge of a sink can end in soaked fur and pathetic mewls. An extraordinary leap in fluid motion can end in a misstep that sends her careening into a tailspin. Then…wipeout!

As funny as it can be to watch a cat fall from its self-imposed pedestal, even more humorous is the effect such a drop has on the cat herself. I’m sure you’ve seen it. The cat pauses momentarily to regain equilibrium. Then the frantic grooming starts…”composure grooming” it’s called, and with good reason. It’s all a ploy to save face and send the message, “I’m not a klutz; I meant to do that.”

Such a ploy seems ridiculous. Why can’t the cat be like a dog, admit the flub, laugh at itself and move on?

That’s what happens when you take yourself too seriously. It’s not a strictly feline failing, though. Far from it. In this area, Shadow and I are much alike.

Perfection can be a heavy burden, whether the expectation is external—parents, friends or spouse—or internal. Any time people or cats place themselves on pedestals, they’re destined to fall.

Such stumbles can be spectacular, like the fall of a revered Christian leader into sin. Or, they can be minor, like forgetting to prepare a Sunday School lesson. Either way, it becomes a real problem if our need for perfection doesn’t allow us to fess up and (if appropriate) laugh at ourselves. The Bible calls this by a specific name…pride.

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18). Or, if you prefer, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace” (Proverbs 11:2). On the other hand, “The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom, and humility goes before honor” (Proverbs 15:33).

Don’t you just love Proverbs?

In case you think that’s the only book that talks about pride and humility, Jesus reminds us in the book of Matthew, “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth” (5:5).

We are called to humility. If the above verses didn’t make it clear, you only have to look in the dictionary to find that pride is the opposite of humility.

Part of pride is making your mistakes more important than they are. Have you ever said or done something that made your cheeks burn for days whenever you thought about it? Yet, when you next talked to your friends, had they forgotten all about it? Probably. That’s pride in play. If a cat falls off the back of the couch, the other cats don’t think about it past the moment. The master notices, but loves the cat all the more for its foibles. The cat, by being to proud to laugh at itself, misses all the fun!

So many of us feel our failings are in our failures…our trips, our stumbles and missteps, our plunges into the cold water of the aquarium. Christ never said that. We don’t need to be perfect; He was perfect for us. What does God want? Psalms reminds us.

“The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise” (Psalm 51:17).

A broken spirit is the opposite of a proud spirit; a contrite heart is a humble heart.

When we focus on God, we take the focus off ourselves. That leaves us free to climb down off our precarious perch. If we climb off our pedestals, a stumble isn’t such a cat-astrophe! We won’t have as far to fall, and there will likely be a friendly hand to reach out and steady us. If our pride won’t let us admit that we have had—or could have or will have—a misstep, we may be in for some lonely composure grooming.

No, I Haven't Forgotten

2010-03-28T17:41:00.001-05:00

This is just a quick update in case anyone thinks I've forgotten about this blog already.

My plan is to update with new thoughts around the 1st and 15th of every month.

I don't have any idea if or when Shadow will choose to give input...and I don't hold myself responsible for what she says when she does!

See you in a couple of days!

At Rest in the Master's Arms

2010-03-19T15:03:00.003-05:00

Here's our first post in our new direction...let us know what you think!

Cats are known for their “I-don’t-need-anyone” attitude, but they have a softer side. In fact, despite a façade of fierce independence, Shadow loves to be near me. When I work, she’s a furry ornament perched on my desk, never more than a few feet from me.

Her favorite pastime is lying on my lap while I’m at rest. After a day of frenetic activity, she watches for the first sign that I’m settling in for the evening. She also makes it clear that midday naps are nice, while going to bed at night…bedtime is pure bliss. She runs ahead of me to the bedroom and waits expectantly while I prepare for bed and snuggle in under the covers. As soon as she’s sure I’m settled, she jumps up beside me. She completes her own routine of purring, “making biscuits,” and a short wash before she curls up next to my stomach, tucked safely into the curve of my body. When I wake in the middle of the night, I feel the gentle vibration of her purr and the warmth of her body, unmoved in the hours between. The wordless message is clear. There is no better place than secure and at rest beside her human.

How often does God wish we took the same attitude toward spending time with Him?

Humans in general are held captive by their—our—need to be doing. That could take the form of distractions that pull us from God’s presence. We might even be stretched thin by the desire to do things for God. Work, school, church, family time, Bible study, play time…all good, all necessary, but all capable of pulling us from that oh-so-important quiet time with God.

After all, when Elijah waited to hear from God, it was in a “still, small voice” that he got the message. It’s that same sound, the whisper in the silence, that we miss if we’re too busy stalking mice or batting at balls. It’s in that same hectic pace that we miss the gentler ministrations, the scratch on the chin, the pet on the head, the soothing words that bring a contented purr welling from deep within as we rest in arms filled with love.

Take a lesson from Shadow. Be still and feel the warmth of God’s presence. Be still and listen for his voice.

“Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)

New Management, New Blog

2010-03-17T10:23:00.002-05:00

Hello...Shadow's person, here. As you can see by some of the post dates, Shadow has dropped off on her Internet usage (or maybe she's too busy with her online RPGs). Regardless, we're going to switch and do a little reformatting with this blog. Yup, the human is taking over!

It's still mostly about Shadow, though. I will, with some help from my feline partner, share some spiritual insights from the world of catdom. Sound crazy? You'll just have to check back and see when we get going.

See you soon!

Cat's Turmoil

2008-09-19T13:00:00.002-05:00

Things are still upside-down in my house. More things have gone into boxes, and I've actually started sleeping in that crate my human put in the bedroom. It's not too bad in there--the pillow is my favorite.

My humans have been throwing around the words "Arizona" and "Oregon" a lot. I guess those are places. The Mutt has been talking about an interview in "Oregon." They talk like it's really important, but I have a hard time paying attention to human talk.

I've also had to play nursemaid to my human. She's sick again. It helps her when I lay on her neck and purr. Since she's my human, I do what I can.

Cat TV Time

2008-09-11T19:01:00.005-05:00

Things are crazy around here. Aside from spending so much time with the Screamer, my humans have put almost everything in the house into boxes. My human spends a lot of time moving things around and putting the rest of the things into boxes.

I have a lot of time on my own, so I've started watching TV. I like re-runs of the X-Files (that's what I'm watching in this picture) ... I know I could do every bit as good as Mulder does with those cases.

Speaking of mysteries, my human put a strange crate in the bedroom. She put a pillow in there, and both humans put treats in there for me. It seems comfortable, but I avoid it. Something seems fishy, and not in a good way. I also here them talking about "cat" and "car." It's making me nervous.

I've got to go ... the Screamer is at it again, and it's giving me a headache.

Things Changed...A Lot

2008-09-04T18:44:00.002-05:00

It turned out my human's growing stomach meant there was another human coming to live with us. (I'm not sure what the connection was, but when they brought the Screamer back, my human was thinner.) I guess it's a human, anyway It's not much bigger than I am, and it screams a lot ... it gives me a headache. Since the Screamer came, I haven't had much time with my human or the Mutt. I spend most of my time under the bed in my room.

On the plus side, I think they feel guilty, because they've been giving me more treats than ever. (Of course, I'd get them myself, but I don't have thumbs.)

More Time with the Mutt

2008-09-04T18:35:00.004-05:00

Starting last September, things started to change ... for the worst, as far as I'm concerned. My human started getting preoccupied and her stomach started growing. She didn't like me "making biscuits" on her stomach any more, so I started spending more time with the Mutt. What'sthe human saying? "Any port in a storm."

Laundry Makes a Good Cat Bed

2007-12-21T09:30:00.000-05:00

I don't know why my humans always complain about me lying in the laundry basket. If they're going to put clean laundry in my sunning spot, they have to accept the consequences. Besides, the clean laundry makes a soft, cozy bed on a cold afternoon. What could be better?

Lyin' Around

2007-12-21T09:29:00.000-05:00

I posted this picture because I think I look kind of cute in it. I guess I should have cropped out the Mutt's legs, first. He's always in the way!

Can We Let the Cat Read, Please?

2007-12-21T09:28:00.000-05:00

Sometimes my humans are snap-happy with that camera. Here, My human and I are trying to read while the Mutt butts in with that stupid camera flash. My human and I don't read a lot of the same books, but I like a good fantasy novel (about cats, of course) as well as anyone. Tailchaser's Song, anyone?

Darn Yarn

2007-12-21T09:27:00.000-05:00

I don't know why I have such a fascination--morbid fascination, almost--with yarn. I've posted this picture to show how cruel the Mutt can be. Look how he's taken advantage of my weakness by using yarn to hypnotize me. Isn't there a law against that?

Cat...Fish?

2007-12-10T10:24:00.000-05:00

I thought my humans would have been over this fish kick by now, but they're not. They have three different kinds of cory catfish in their tank, and now they've added two things called "loaches." They're long and narrow, and look like pieces of ribbon floating in the water. They keep swimming in circles, and it makes me dizzy. I wish they'd stop for a while.

The Cat's Evil Side

2007-12-08T19:40:00.000-05:00

My human seems to think these pictures show my evil side. I don't think so, but I'm sharing the pictures so my fans can decide.

Personally, I think I look pretty cool with rays shooting from my eyes.

I wasn't able to crop my human out of the last picture. Sorry about that. I know no one wants to look at her.

The Cat's Foods

2007-11-27T15:27:00.000-05:00

I thought it was time to clear something up. These, and only these, are the human foods I like:

Tuna
Ice Cream (preferably vanilla)
Marinara Sauce
Cornbread Stuffing

I also like my cat food, water, grass and aloe vera plants. Crickets are only to play with.

I'll let everyone know if anything changes.

Happy New Year

2007-01-05T15:29:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year? Unless this is the year of the cat, I really don't care. The whole idea of years is silly, anyway...just like birthdays.

My humans are upset about the weather. It's really warm. I like it, because my human keeps the porch door open while she's working, so I can go outside. I don't know why they'd want it to be colder.

This is a picture my human took of me just before midnight on New Year's Eve. Okay, so I don't look happy. I was hoping they'd go out like they did last year so I could have my own party. No such luck.

I wish my human would take down the Christmas lights. She talks about leaving them up for the "12 days of Christmas," whatever that means. Still, when you have Christmas lights on and the door open and the fan going...even I know that's ridiculous, and I'm a cat.

They got two more albino catfish last weekend. I don't know why they bother, when they keep disappearing like they do. They named the bigger one Isaiah and the smaller one Malachi. They seem to think it will make Ren happier to have company. I say they'll disappear just like Stimpy and Moby. Not that I know anything about it...

Post-Christmas Picture of the Cat

2006-12-29T22:06:00.000-05:00

My human put on a sweater she got for Christmas and made me take a picture with her. When will she figure out that I HATE GETTING MY PICTURE TAKEN...unless it's my idea. Then it's okay.

Christmas Torture

2006-12-28T14:44:00.000-05:00

My humans opened their Christmas presents to each other when they got home. They didn't give me anything...hmph! Not even a little toy mouse. Like a little canned tuna was going to make up for a snub like that.

I like the wrapping paper, though, so I was right next to my human while she was unwrapping. She put one of the bows on my head. I guess she thought it would be funny. I didn't think it was funny. I didn't like it at all, actually. Why do humans think it's funny to do the most insulting things to cats? How would she like it if I put a bow on her head?

Holiday Blues...Feline Version

2006-12-27T15:44:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't written anything for a while, but I've been very down lately. My human left me for Thanksgiving (the mutt stayed with me for a while...just my luck), and then again for Christmas (that time the mutt left too). I got so depressed both times that I couldn't even think of blogging. When she came back, she said she missed me. I don't know if I believe her. I was angry enough to punish her thoroughly after Thanksgiving. When they got back yesterday, though, I was so relieved I couldn't be angry. I haven't been able to stop purring since last night. It's so nice to have my human home. She says she won't be going away again any time soon. I hope she's telling the truth. I don't want to be left alone any more!

No pictures today. I'll post some when I have more time.

Feline Correspondence and Other Matters

2006-11-16T18:16:00.000-05:00

Today I got an email from a cat who lives with my human's parents. His name is B.J. I've never met him, but he has a point. "At least your human could provide you with a good place to lay, with a nice afghan to cover you and keep you warm," he wrote. He's right; I should get a softer bed in my thinking spot! By the way, this is a picture B.J. sent of him with his blanket...you can hardly see him, but the blanket looks cozy.

My human had more "root canals" today. I guess it's something with her teeth, because she was showing them to the mutt when she got home. She was trying to drink coffee out of a bottle, but she kept tilting her head like she was afraid the coffee was going to fall out of the left side of her mouth. If I weren't a cat, I would have laughed.

She hasn't been very friendly in the evenings lastely. She's been working on Christmas presents for other humans, so lots of times there's no room in her lap for me. I get very disgruntled. She's sewing something for her "mother-in-law." I think that's the mutt's mother, but I'm not sure what the law has to do with it. She's trying to get it done fast, though, because of that whole birth-day thing humans do.

That reminds me...my human says her parents read my blog, so she told me not to post anything she wouldn't want her parents to read. I don't know why she's worried. This blog isn't about her.

This picture of me is one my human says is "too cute." Well, when you're right, you're right!

Trying to Sleep

2006-11-13T14:39:00.000-05:00

Get that camera out of my face...I'm sleeping!

Beads and Other Catly Things

2006-11-09T18:21:00.000-05:00

Remember those beads my human wouldn't let me help with? Here's a picture of me with them. I think it was mean to make me take a picture with the beads when I couldn't help her with them. She did let me play with some other beads today. Somehow, though, it wasn't as much fun when she wasn't trying to stop me.

This is a picture she took of me today. I'm posting this one because she seemed to think I was awfully cute in it. She made a big deal over it.

I've been tired all day. Last night my human had her "tribal" performance. I saw her get ready. She looked scary. She and the mutt got home really late, and then my human couldn't sleep..."insomnia" again. So, I didn't have a restful night either. Just because she can't sleep, can't she lie still in one spot so I can get comfortable? I had to nap more than usual to make up for it.

In My Thinking Spot

2006-11-08T14:54:00.000-05:00

Here I am in my thinking spot again. I uploaded this picture because my human says I have this look on my face a lot.

In fact, she says I have that look on my face right now.

So, what's her point?

Teeth, Beads and an Annoyed Cat

2006-11-07T14:33:00.000-05:00

Here's another picture of me sitting on the back of the couch. Yup, another picture where I'm trying to sleep and they're setting off a flash in my face.

My human went to get something called a "root canal" yesterday. I thought it had something to do with plants, because those are the only things I know of that have roots, but when she came back, she seemed to be having trouble with her mouth. It looked like she'd forgotten how to use the right side of her mouth. She ate soup for lunch, and it was funny to watch.

She was doing something with beads this morning. They were all different sizes and shapes. I wanted to help, but she kept shooing me away. She was really rude. She said knocking them on the floor was not helping. Well, maybe it wasn't helpful, but it was fun.

Today was the humans' election day. Both the humans went to vote. I guess it's a big deal. I don't understand why. I think cats should run the world...everything would be much simpler. Then again, that sounds like a lot of work, so maybe not. It's probably better to let the humans keep giving themselves high blood pressure.

The Fish Tank and More Pictures of Shadow

2006-11-06T10:52:00.000-05:00

Here's a picture of me sitting on the back of the couch. The mutt took it, so it's a little fuzzy. He likes to take pictures of my human and I. I guess that's okay, because we're cute, but I wish they weren't so fuzzy all the time!

I look annoyed in this picture because I didn't want to have my picture taken right at that moment. I was trying to take a nap while they watched T.V. They seem to like to take pictures while I'm trying to take naps. How would they like it if I stuck a flash in their faces while they were trying to sleep?

I've talked so much about the fish, I thought I should post a picture of their tank. You can kind of see all the fish on the right side of the tank. Bob, the snail, is over to the left. The flash made the picture kind of blurry; I think it scared the fish, too.

My Human's Jack-o-Lantern

2006-11-01T09:47:00.000-05:00

Since yesterday was Halloween, here's a picture of the jack-o-lantern my human carved the other day. It's kind of shriveled, so you can't really see the teeth any more, but there it is. I still think I could have carved a better one.

My human dressed up last night. She dressed in her "tribal" costume. I don't know if she scared the trick-or-treaters, but she scared me. I decided to wait under the bed until the trick-or-treaters were gone and she'd changed back to herself. Whew! Am I glad that's over.

Happy Halloween! Or even better: Happy All Saints Day!

Shadow the Cat Looks Like a Green-Eyed Monster

2006-10-31T09:32:00.000-05:00

The green-eye effect in this picture makes me look kind of evil. I guess I'm ready for Halloween!

Still More Pictures

2006-10-30T09:31:00.000-05:00

This second picture is of me sitting by the couch. My human didn't get all of me in the picture, but I thought it had a nice "artsy" effect.

I'm trying to chew some paper on my human's desk, and she's telling me to stop. Doesn't she realize that only makes me want to do it even more?

More Pictures

2006-10-30T09:24:00.000-05:00

Not much to say today, but here are a couple more pictures. This first one is a close-up of me in my thinking spot.

Finally...Pictures of Shadow the Cat

2006-10-29T18:19:00.000-05:00

The camera is finally working. It's about time. My human didn't even fix it. One day it wasn't working, and the next it was. The mutt said he guessed all they needed to do was let it sit for a couple of months and it would fix itself.

This is a picture of me brainstorming. My human's "inbox" is my favorite place to sit and think. I'm glad she added the cloth; it was kind of hard before.

Jack-o-Lanterns Should Look Like Cats

2006-10-27T10:03:00.000-05:00

Yesterday my human carved a pumpkin for Halloween. It took her a really long time. So long, in fact, I took a nap while she did it. When the mutt got home, he raved about how good it looked. I didn't think it was anything special. It looked like a human face, only even uglier. It would have been much better to make the face look like a cat's. I wish they'd let me carve the pumpkin. I'd do a much better job. Too bad I don't have thumbs.

My Human's Birthday

2006-10-24T10:07:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was my human's birthday. They went out to celebrate in the evening. I don't see what the big deal is...I don't even know when my birthday is. I was born in the spring, I think.

Still, the fish and I chipped in to buy the birthday dinner. Of course, I had to chip in more than the fish. They don't get out a lot, so they don't have much money...freeloaders. I can pick my people's pockets, so I'm always able to have a little bit of cash. Hey, it's not stealing...it's neccessity. I couldn't let the mutt get all the glory!

Feline Ramblings

2006-10-18T09:26:00.000-05:00

Today is Wednesday again...yard day. I hate the noise. Do they really need to cut the grass every single week? it can't grow that fast, can it?

The humans were treating Prospero for that fungal infection thing, then they noticed that he had "fin rot." They freaked out! Yesterday, my human took a break and went and got him some new medicine. I think it's helping. The past few days, Prospero hid under his cave, only coming up for air and food, but today he's swimming around and chasing Frank. Looks like he's back to himself again.

The weather is crazy. The other night it was so cold, my humans got out the space heater to warm the living room. Yesterday, it rained a lot, but it wasn't cold--it was hot and humid. Today my human turned the air conditioning on. I can't say I'm sorry; it was pretty hot in here. Still, the weather shouldn't be this nuts. Why can't it make up it's mind: summer or fall? Personally, I think it's time for fall.

My human bought the mutt some game for his computer, and she's started playing it too. Now her score is higher than his, and she teases him. I don't think he likes it. I'm not surprised, though. Of course she's better. She's my human. I would only own the best.

A Weekend in October

2006-10-16T09:14:00.000-05:00

This weekend was good, I guess. My human had "insomnia" Saturday night, then had to get up for church Sunday morning, so we never did get really comfortable. She brought me some tuna when they came home though, That was really good. Last night she slept through the night, so we both got some rest. Today, everything is back to normal.

Saturday night, the humans noticed that Prospero had some white spots on him. They decided it was a "fungul infection," or something like that. Sunday, they changed all the water in the tank and then put in some kind of medicine. I hope prospero is all right. I'd hate for another fish to die. I still like to watch them.

Right now my human has the dishwasher and and washing machine going. It's really loud. I don't know how she can even think with all the noise.

I wish she'd open the door and let me on the porch, but I think she thinks it's too cold. It was nice and cool yesterday. I loved it. There was a big party going on outside, though, with lots of noise, and I didn't like that. I don't think the humans did either. I don't like it when they have parties, but at least their parties are never that loud.

The Cat's Human -- Dans la Maison

2006-10-10T09:40:00.000-05:00

My human is finally back. Just as I thought, she's sick, and her nose is leaking. It's still good to have her back, though. I guess her mutt thought so too; we fought over who got to cuddle closest. He won, 'cause he's bigger, but I had the last laugh...he has to leave the house some time, and then she's all mine. She's back working at her computer now, and I have all day to sit in her lap. Ahhhh... Actually, it hasn't been too bad, even with he mutt. He's been giving me treats since she got back. My human even gave me ice cream on Sunday night. She never gives me very much, but what I get is really good.

In fact, life is good!

Lonely Cat

2006-10-04T19:15:00.000-05:00

My human has been gone all week, since Sunday. She went to that place called "California" again. I miss her a lot. Her mutt is still here, though. Of course I wouldn't be lucky enough to have him be gone all week. She calls and talks to him every night, but he never passes the phone to me. He and I never talk to each other, so I never ask for it. He could offer, though. All he does is keep the food and water filled...the bare minimum. My human said she would be back Friday, but that still seems a long time away.

I overheard them talking last night, and it sounds like she got sick. On the one hand, it serves her right for leaving me. On the other hand, I know humans don't like it when they get sick...my human always seems to be in a lot of pain, and her nose leaks. I guess that's one of the advantages to being a cat. I've never been sick.

I hope my human isn't hanging around with other cats, or (shudder) dogs. I can't wait for her to come home so I can snuggle up in her lap!

Bird in the House

2006-09-27T08:28:00.000-05:00

You probably think from the title of this post that my human bought a bird to add to this zoo. Well, no, there are no birds. Yesterday, though, one of the finches came back to the hanging pot where their nest is. My human had the deck door open, so I was on the threshold watching it. I guess it got confused, because instead of flying away, it flew right through the door and into the house! I think it was freaked out, though. It flapped around in circles a couple times and shot right back out the door. Flew away and never looked back. It was fun while it lasted. I wish it had flown lower...mmmmm.

Today is yard day, so it's all loud outside. Other humans bring these big machines to cut the grass, and sometimes I can't even hear myself think, they're so loud. That's why I don't like Wednesdays. Well, that and my human goes to "dance class." I don't like it when she's gone at night.

Cat Update

2006-09-15T08:12:00.000-05:00

I haven't been writing much lately. It's hard to, because my human is home all the time now, and I don't want her to catch me at the computer.

This is a picture she made me take with her. There's a camera in her computer, and she's always playing with it. I didn't want to take a picture that way, but I guess it turned out all right. She used something called a "thermal" setting to take it. Her hair looks all funny because she had just taken a shower. I don't understand how humans can get all wet like that. Eesh!

Shadow the Cat Meets Ernesto

2006-09-01T08:31:00.000-05:00

I'm really tired today. My human had something called "insomnia" last night, so I didn't sleep much, either. The storm they call Ernesto is here, but it just seems like a lot of rain to me. There's some wind, so my human took down the hanging plants outside, but it's basically all rain. Lots of rain. I wouldn't want to be outside.

I didn't write much last week, so I never mentioned that my humans go another fish. It's an albino "catfish" to replace the other one. This one is smaller, so it's the smallest fish in the tank. They named it Moby Dick. They seemed to think the name was funny, but I'm not sure why.

Anyway, today is a good day to curl up with my human and sleep. She's all grumpy because she has to work, and because of the "insomnia," but I can still curl up in her lap and sleep. Life is good.

Cats as Comic Book Heroes

2006-08-21T08:36:00.000-05:00

This weekend my human and her mutt were playing on her computer. (I say playing, because I don't think they were doing anything useful.) They came up with this really cool page that made me look like a superhero--The Samurai Shadow. They thought it was funny, but I thought it only did me justice. Of course I'm a superhero! All cats are.

On a different note, one of the two albino "catfish" is gone. Not floating in the tank, not dead at the bottom, just gone. The humans think it somehow jumped out of the tiny hole by the filter. They couldn't find the body, though, so then they said I must have eaten it after it jumped out. As if! I have no idea what happened to the little wierdo. It's sure not in the tank any more, though. They do have the worst luck with fish. At least Frank, Marie, Prospero and Ren are all still there. They're wierd, but I do like to watch them.

An Outnumbered Cat

2006-08-13T13:45:00.000-05:00

My humans bought two more fish yesterday. I don't know what they're thinking with all these fish. They're not good for anything. They just swim around in the tank with their big googly eyes staring all the time. The two new fish are really wierd-looking. The humans call them "albino catfish." I don't know what albino means, but they sure don't look like cats. What I do know is that I'm starting to feel outnumbered. Five fish, two humans and one cat. It's not fair!

On the plus side, my human is home all the time now. They moved a new computer into the house, and now she sits there all day, "working." Also, that little red light is back. I love that red light, even though it makes me crazy. I can't ever catch it.

The Kinds of Morning Games a Cat Likes

2006-08-01T13:28:00.000-05:00

This morning I ran away when my human tried to pet me. I was trying to get her to chase me, but humans are so dumb sometimes. All she did was sing, "Zoom, zoom zoom!" She said that was my theme song. Theme song? Humans are so silly. All I wanted to do was play.

She took the bed out of the guest room this weekend. It looks a lot bigger in there, but I used to like to hide under the bed. Now I don't know where to hide in that room. It's still messy, though. Maybe I'll hide under some of the junk.

Another Picture of a Gorgeous Cat

2006-07-26T08:51:00.000-05:00

I was finally able to upload that other old picture of me. My eyes are all glowy in this one, too. I don't know why that happens. Anyway, aren't I cute?

No Pictures of the Cat: The Camera is Still Broken

2006-07-24T15:44:00.000-05:00

I think I forgot to mention that my human sent the camera to be fixed. Well, it came back...still broken. She was very upset. I'm not very happy either. They still can't take any pictures of me. Well, there's the old-fashioned kind, but they have to get those developed, scan them in, blah, blah, blah...Point is, I can't post any new pictures. I found another old one, but it's taking a really long time to upload. I don't know if I'll manage it for this post.

Nope, I guess not. Maybe another day.

More Fish: Meet Prospero

2006-07-24T10:31:00.001-05:00

The human's are on some kind of fish kick.

Frank and Marie weren't getting along very well...Frank is bigger, and takes all the food. My human and her mutt decided to get another fish. I don't see how adding another fish will help anything, but that's what they did. They went out yesterday and came back with another betta. I have a feeling that was the mutt's doing. This one isn't blue, though; it's red. They talked about it for a while, but finally named it Prospero...something about Shakespeare. I can tell it was my human's idea, and not the other one's. He probably would have named it Mr. Red.

I guess having three fish is working pretty well after all. Frank tries to bully Prospero like he does Marie---and he pretty much leaves Marie alone now--but Prospero isn't having any of it. He just sits there with his red fins waving, like he doesn't have a care in the world. Maybe he'll put Frank in his place.

Seeing the fish in the tank, I kind of wish I had another cat to talk to. Then again, I'd have to share my human with her mutt and another cat. Better if it's just me.

New Fish in the House

2006-07-20T13:50:00.000-05:00

My human went out and bought two new fish. They're not like Mr. Blue was. She calls the Tetras, and put them in a big tank with a lid. I guess that means there's no more drinking out of the fish tank. What's a cat to do for fresh water. Tap water? Ugh! I'd much rather drink out of the toilet if they'd just leave the lid up. My human's mutt does sometimes, but then she gets mad, so most of the time it's down.

Anyway, the new fish are fun to watch. They swim around a lot more than Mr. Blue did. They're not very colorful, but they're a shiny gold color. My human named them Frank and Marie. At least they ddn't name them, "Mr. and Mrs. Fish."

No More Mr. Blue

2006-07-18T08:18:00.000-05:00

Mr. Blue died yesterday. He was sick in the morning, and by evening he was dead. My humans didn't know what to do. I know they miss him--my human cried a little. I'll miss him, too. He didn't speak cat, so we didn't talk much, but he was fun to watch.

They say they're going to get more fish, but not a betta. My human says it's too soon to replace Mr. Blue. At least I'll have more fish to watch.

How Little Red Lights Can Drive Cats Crazy

2006-06-29T10:04:00.000-05:00

When my human came home from dance class last night, there was this little red light with her. I don't think she brought it, because I didn't see her touch it, but it showed up when she did. It drove me crazy. It was this little red dot of light that was moving around on its own, and it kept disappearing and reappearing. I chased it for a long time, but even when I thought I had it, I didn't. Sometimes it would be on my paw, and I wouldn't even feel anything. When it finally went away, I looked all over for it, but couldn't find it. My human's mutt said he was sure it would be back. I don't know if I can believe him, though. I wonder if it was like what they call a firefly, only red? If it was, why didn't I ever see it in the air?

Cat & Mouse Games

2006-06-28T11:10:00.000-05:00

My human put my bouncy mouse back up. It's a mouse that hangs from the doorframe. I'm really glad, it's back, because it gives me something to do when she's not here. After all, I can't sleep all day. My human's mutt had taken the mouse down, because he kept running into it. That's his fault for not watching where he's going! Anyway, I got bored sometimes when I didn't have the mouse. A couple days ago, I was even playing with a plastic ring. Actually, the plastic ring is pretty fun, so I might keep it anyway.

The camera is still broken--now it's saying "write error"--but I found another old picture of myself to post. In this picture, I'm sitting waiting for my human to help me with the laundry. Really, she's so useless sometimes. I don't know why my eyes came out all funny and glowing like that. I look kind of scary.

Why don't humans know how to exercise like cats?

2006-06-22T09:20:00.000-05:00

My human has been going to "dance class" again. She came home last night complaining about sore muscles. I don't understand why humans have such a hard time exercising. Even though this apartment is small, I run around and get exercise all the time. I think my human thinks it's funny; she calls it "Buffalo Kitty" when I run around.

The camera is still broken, but I found an old picture of me. Part of my human's foot is in the picture, but, still, it's not too bad.

Why No Pictures of the Cat?

2006-06-21T11:05:00.000-05:00

You may be wondering why I haven't posted a picture of myself in while...after all, I'm beautiful, so why wouldn't I show off? The fact is, my human broke the camera--now it says something about card not initialized. She says she didn't do anything and doesn't know what's wrong, but she must have done something. Last night she thought she fixed it. She kept trying it out by trying to take picture of me. It didn't record the pictures, but it sure flashed...now I'm a blind cat! Well, not seriously, but I didn't like it. She talked a lot about reformatting the card, and I guess it didn't work. She got really angry, but that worked out. She went to bed early, so I got to curl up next to her longer than usual. So, no pictures, but more cuddle time. I guess that works.

Why Can't Humans Sleep like Cats?

2006-06-20T11:14:00.000-05:00

My human had trouble sleeping again last night. She has that problem a lot. I wonder why humans can't just lie down and sleep anywhere? I can. It seems like they get too worried, and their minds won't rest. How silly! My human needs to learn to relax.

The Cat's Midday Nap

2006-06-19T14:46:00.000-05:00

I was so happy today...I wasn't able to take my usual weekend naps with my human, but she came home for her midday break today, and we laid down. It was too bad the mutt was there--he's usually not there at the same time she is--but it was still nice. I curled up across her neck and purred. I don't usually do that; I save it for a special treat. She seems to like it. Even though she can't purr, I can tell she's "purring on the inside." I just wish she didn't have to go back to her work. I wonder what she does all day that's so important?

Lonely Weekend

2006-06-17T12:52:00.000-05:00

I'm lonely this weekend. My human has to be away at a "training" -- I don't know what that means exactly, but she's away all day. I'm stuck here with the mutt and Mr. Blue. They're both so boring, except when the mutt teases me. That's when I want to incinerate him with my gaze. (I've tried, because I know all about the power of the mind, but so far it hasn't worked.) I can't wait for my human to come home again so I can cuddle with her!

Mind Games

2006-06-07T09:20:00.000-05:00

It's so much fun to play to with humans' minds. I play a game with my human where I stare up at her and look all sad and puzzled. Don't meow; just stare. It's so much fun! This morning I tried it while she was in the kitchen. She said, "Don't look at me that way, Sahdow. I feel like a monster, and I don't even know what I did!" Then she gave me some of the crunchy treats with the chewy centers. He he he.

Mr. Blue

2006-05-31T11:29:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't posted in a while, but I've been busy. At least I've been entertained. My human bought a fish for her mutt...I guess everyone needs a pet. They call it a Betta. The fish is blue, so he named it "Mr. Blue." I'm glad he didn't name me! I would have ended up with a name like "Miss Gray" or "Mrs. Cat." I like the fish, though. They think they're clever because I haven't eaten the fish yet--they did figure out I can get on top of the television to look at it--but they have no idea the tricks I play on it when they're not home. He-he. Yes, I like Mr. Blue.

Relaxing Sunday

2006-04-03T16:55:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was really nice. It was the humans' church day, so they were gone in the morning, but they left the windows open so I could sit and look out the screen. Then, when they came back, my human read and I sat in her lap all day. They even opened the screen door a little so I could go out on the porch. The same Tommy came back and talked to me, but I wasn't interested...I'd much rather sit on my human's lap than talk to some love-sick Tom cat. He said I was pretty, though, and that was nice. My human also gave me some of my favorite treats, the kind that are crunchy on the outside and soft in the middle. It was a great day.

Shadow the Cat's Friday Night Date -- Almost

2006-03-10T22:08:00.000-05:00

My human's mutt is so overprotective, like he's my father or something. I went out to the porch tonight to see if I could get a date for Friday night. A cute grey tommy showed up, and we started talking. Before things could get anywhere though, the human sent me to my room! Imagine. You'd think he was in charge here or something. My human was also insulting; she said I couldn't go out with the tom because he looked like my brother. As if!

I've been marking like crazy to show them who's boss. I don't know what else to do. Any advice for dealing with naughty humans?

This Cat Likes Sci-Fi

2006-03-03T22:10:00.000-05:00

Tonight was Sci-Fi night. My human and I sit on the couch and watch the Sci-Fi Channel. There are two "Stargate" program that are pretty good. I just wish they had some cats in them. I like the wraith, though...those are my kinds of villains!

Best of all, though, my human and I get to cuddle while we watch TV. I hate to admit it, but I do look forward to that at the end of each day. I wouldn't tell her that for the world, though. Actually, it wouldn't matter if I did, because humans only understand you if you shout, and then only a little. Dense animals.

Peace & Quiet in the Cat's House

2006-02-25T11:47:00.000-05:00

Finally, everything seems back to normal. My human and that mutt she adopted have stopped making so much noise, and my human is back to cuddling with me. I still smell the other cats whenever she comes home, though, so that's still a problem. It just has to stop. She's also been spending a lot of time on the computer, which means she's not paying attention to me and I can't get to the computer to post on my blog. I don't think the male likes it, either. Today is one of her days to stay home, though, and we got to lay in bed almost until the human's lunchtime. It's even better, because the other one had to go out, so we had the bed to ourselves. Mmmmm....

Now, if I can just get her to see that she has to change my litter box. I certainly don't want to do it....Yuck!

The Cat's Territory

2006-02-21T20:05:00.000-05:00

My human is angry, and I don't get it. All I did was lay claim to her. She was ignoring me, and the other human keeps trying to claim her as his, so I wanted to make it clear that she belonged to me. Usually a forehead mark is enough, but sometimes stronger measures are needed. For some reason, when I jumped in her lap and made my mark, though, she got mad.

Humans apparently don't understand anything about territory. This whole apartment is mine, so I mark it accordingly (just in case anyone gets any ideas). Every time they find out, they get angry. As if this place is theirs. Please! I let them have free reign of the food, the furniture, the TV, the bed...they just need an occasional reminder of who's really in charge here.

Besides, my human comes home with the scent of other cats on her, every day. Those other cats don't need to get any ideas. I have their number, and they can't have my human. I'll mark her whenever I have to.

The Cat is Tired of This Crap

2006-02-21T15:33:00.000-05:00

Let me introduce myself. My name is Shadow, and I'm a cat. And, as my blog title says, I'm tired of this crap.

So people rule the world. Get over youselves! It's not all about you. I think it's time somebody told the cat's side of the story, and that's what I'm here to do. Okay, sometimes, you'll get a little of a rant, but I'm here to tell it straight up...uncut...unvarnished...blah, blah, blah. If there are any dogs out there, keep off. This is my territory.